Forget all those other league tables: make way for the Red Mole alternative ratings, based on the votes of more than 7,000 students from across the country. Top of the heap is Dundee, owing to the quality of its student union and the most attractive females in the United Kingdom. The hunkiest men are at Lancaster; Loughborough has the best sporting facilities; and Leeds is still the place to go for a great night out. The Golden Triangle appears tarnished: seven of the overall top ten institutions are north of Birmingham. Bottom place goes to Teesside University, which also scores lowest in the sexiness ratings.
I'll say this only twice
At last an explanation for why students sometimes feel they are hearing the same lecture over and over again. In an interview with the University of the West of England's staff newsletter, Chad Staddon, senior lecturer in human geography at UWE, confesses to partaking in the repeated words game. This involves trying to insert odd words or phrases into lectures as many times as possible. In one lecture, he says, he used the phrase "as the sirocco swirled about the dusty camp" three or four times. Of course, he makes clear, this was when he was in Kentucky.
Killing two birds
Some mothers do get a little over-involved in their daughters' wedding dresses, but not many go as far as studying them for a degree. Rosemary Bowe, 55, initially attended a summer school at Heriot-Watt University's school of textiles and went on to enrol for a degree course in textile design and clothing manufacture. She designed the dress for her daughter, Rosemary, as a third-year project, and made it on campus during the vacation.
Blunkett's the wag
Never mind the Labour Party conference fringe, education secretary David Blunkett should try his wit at the next Edinburgh Festival. Mr Blunkett was making his way to an Association of Colleges fringe meeting to receive an award for services to the sector, unaccompanied by his guide dog. A well-wisher stopped him and asked, "Where's the dog?" The secretary of state raised the empty harness and, feigning shock, said: "Oh my God."