Laurie Taylor Column

My first duty today is to thank our Director of Corporate Affairs, Mr Jamie Targett, for his admirable presentation of this university's new organisational plan. As Jamie argued so lucidly, it is difficult to see how this university ever managed to conduct its affairs without the type of comprehensive analysis of its aims, goals, functions, values, outcomes, inputs and outputs that is displayed on the screen above.

Now, are there any points of clarification or exemplification anyone wishes to raise with Mr Targett? Yes, Professor Lapping?

Well, it just occurred to me that if you take the dotted line between Occupational Output and Academic Input...

That's this directional point here.

That's the one. And then extend that broken line to the Mission Statement and then draw a solid line from that dotted line to Institutional Goals box...

Can we all follow that? Good. Yes please, Professor Lapping, do go on.

And then draw a new solid line to Learning Outcomes and an extra dotted line to Core Values...

That's over here...

That's right. And then draw another new line from Core Values to Organisational Aims...

There we are.

And finally draw a new unbroken line from Organisational Aims to Strategic Plan. And there you have it.

What do we have, Professor Lapping?

Isn't it obvious? A battleship!