Laurie Taylor column

Ah, Noakes, there you are. Yes, come in. Sit down. Relax. Good to see you. How are you?

Very well, thank you, Doctor Quintock.

Excellent. That's the way it should be. Now then, Noakes, I assume that like everyone else who's been queuing outside my door this morning you're anxious to know your project mark.

It would be helpful.

Excellent. Listen Noakes, before we get round to the actual assessment, I wonder if I might say something a little more personal. You see, Noakes, you may have wondered why it was necessary to withhold your mark for so long.

I could see the union's point of view.

Noakes, that's generous. However, I'd like you to know that I had serious doubts about the action short of a strike. Oh, yes. I was all too aware that in suspending my evaluation role I was giving up one of my key duties as a practising academic. And I was also aware of the stress that such an action might arouse in students such as yourself. Indeed, I had every sympathy with the students who wore those T-shirts saying Watch My Words.

"Mark My Words". The T-shirts said "Mark My Words".

Of course they did. Well, anything else I can do for you, Noakes?

I was rather wondering about my project assessment.

Ah, yes, of course. Let's see now. Namier, Nesbit, Noakes. Yes, here we are. Well, Noakes, congratulations are in order. After due consideration your project was finally assessed as Satisfactory.

Thank you very much, Doctor Quintock.

Not at all, Noakes. It's just good to be back to normal. Do send in the next person on your way out, won't you?

Whatever .