Laurie Taylor column

In order to ensure more diversity, universities plan to introduce personality tests as an aid to student selection - The Times , March 3.

This questionnaire will be used to assess your suitability for an undergraduate degree at Poppleton University.

Please place a number after each statement using the following code: 1. Strongly agree 2. Agree 3. Neither agree nor disagree 4.

Disagree 5. Strongly disagree a. I sometimes feel all alone in the world.

b. I like to follow instructions and do what is expected of me.

c. Most of the time I can't understand why my superiors behave the way they do.

d. I think that people can spend too much time reading library books.

e. In the long run the bad things that happen to me are balanced by the good ones.

f. I like spending my time silently in very large groups.

g. I am the sort of person who can get on with things without being told what to do.

h. I like to wait an awfully long time before learning what people think about me.

i. I enjoy making the best of a bad job.

j. I don't like to make demands on busy people.

k. I believe it is not a good idea to think too much.

l. I find that I can sleep easily even when troubled by serious debts.

Your scoring guide

15-30 - your application has been successful. Congratulations!

30-45 - your personality is borderline. How about a foundation course?

45-60 - your personality is unsuited to higher education. Get yourself a decent job and stop whingeing.

(With thanks to The Book of Tests by Michael Nathenson, Fontana Paperbacks.)