How Barbie can inspire school counsellors to break down barriers

Recently I was wearing a pink dress and someone exclaimed that I looked like Barbie. It made me think, what do Barbie and counselling have in common?

As a woman, I am constantly balancing my career and family responsibilities. The movie Barbie struck a deep chord within me, particularly during America Ferrera’s compelling speech. She articulated a sentiment many female leaders feel: “You have to be a boss, but you can’t be mean. You have to lead, but you can’t squash other people’s ideas.”

This resonates with my experiences as a counsellor and leader. I often find myself navigating a delicate balance, striving not to seem overbearing or dismissive. Navigating a world where men predominantly occupy leadership positions presents significant challenges for women.

I aim to inspire the girls I counsel at school, as well as my four daughters. It’s commonly observed that women face the tough choice between career and family but it’s crucial to demonstrate to young girls that balancing both is possible. Although it requires hard work and isn’t straightforward, having a supportive community, like those found in my counselling networks, makes it achievable.

When I was an elementary teacher, I started a “Girl Power” group aimed at helping young girls build healthy friendships. This initiative continued into the pandemic when I transitioned to middle school, where I held online meetings for the same group of girls. We discussed feelings of loneliness and strategies for coping with the pandemic.

This project highlighted the importance of fostering strong relationships among girls from an early age, because these bonds are crucial in supporting their development into adulthood.

Another example of the obstacles we encounter involves a female student of mine who is determined to pursue a career in astronomy, a field that remains male-dominated. As we research together, her passion for overcoming these barriers only grows stronger.

Similarly, a senior student recently expressed concerns about pursuing computer science because it is a male-dominated field. We discussed the critical need for more women in STEM and how she must not let gender stereotypes hinder her aspirations. These conversations underscore the importance of encouraging our female students to dismantle these longstanding barriers.

Moreover, we are not just providing examples for students but for parents. During a recent career day, I was keen on ensuring that the girls had strong role models. One parent confided in me that although she had a law degree, she was a stay-at-home mum and felt she couldn’t present. I reassured her that this was nonsense. Achieving a law degree while balancing motherhood is an incredible feat. Whether working or not, her accomplishments are a powerful testament to her capabilities.

To effectively address these challenges, counsellors can take the following steps to help girls realise their dreams, emphasising that they can achieve anything they set their minds to, regardless of gender:

Active encouragement: Regularly encourage girls to explore all fields, especially those traditionally dominated by men. Highlight stories of female leaders and innovators in these areas. Discuss the language often used to describe ambition in men versus women and actively work to reframe ambition as a positive trait for all students.

Career exposure: Organise workshops and talks with female professionals from a range of industries, including non-traditional roles for women such as software development and policymaking. These events can provide real-world insights and foster mentorship opportunities.

Skill development: Offer workshops that develop skills such as critical thinking, leadership and public speaking. Encourage female students to enter competitions and join extracurricular activities that promote leadership skills, such as debate teams and student council.

Challenge stereotypes: Integrate discussions about gender roles and stereotypes into the curriculum. Encourage critical thinking about these topics in a supportive environment, and help female students who excel in STEM subjects explore a wide range of job opportunities that suit their skills.

Create support networks: Facilitate the creation of peer support groups where girls can share experiences and strategies for overcoming challenges in male-dominated spaces.

So, what’s the connection between Barbie and college counselling? It’s that we need to teach our students, and especially female students, that they can be anything. We cannot make assumptions about careers based on gender, and we need to empower girls to want to engage in an engineering class with a room full of males.

It might seem unusual that we can learn so much from a doll, but let’s embrace this connection and empower our girls. We must offer our female students examples of strong women in leadership roles, demonstrating that they too can achieve such positions.