Water alert

Even worse than the scorpions in Oxford are the students. A three-man crime wave from Oxford was abruptly stopped by a police siege recently. Trouble was, when the police finally rounded up the criminals at gunpoint they discovered that they were in fact three undergraduates having a fight with a high-tech water pistol. Obvious, when you think about it, that it wouldn't have been the real thing. After all, universities are centres of learning.